The Magic of Metaphor in Counselling: The Power of "It's Like..."
By Kaz Hazelwood & Simon Heath
As therapists, coaches, and counsellors, our work is fundamentally anchored in language. We use it to communicate, understand, and create meaningful connections with our clients. But sometimes, it’s not just the words themselves that hold the key to unlocking understanding, it’s the way we use them. A simple phrase like “It’s like…” can open up a world of insights, and that’s where the true magic of metaphor comes in. This humble linguistic tool is far more than a poetic flourish or a clever turn of phrase, it is a powerful gateway to deeper understanding, emotional clarity, and creative problem-solving.
Metaphors possess a special kind of transformative power. They can help clients express emotions, ideas, and experiences that might otherwise feel too complex, overwhelming, or abstract to articulate. When words fail to capture the essence of a feeling, metaphors swoop in, offering a bridge between something intangible and something more concrete and It’s through metaphors that we can navigate the labyrinth of human experience with greater ease. We can move to unlock the hidden layers of thought and emotion that our clients may not even realise are there. The beauty of a metaphor lies not only in its ability to explain, but also in how it opens the door to richer exploration, offering both the client and the therapist a fresh perspective. It’s a form of creative expression; one that can invite new insights and profound shifts in understanding.
Metaphors Make the Invisible Visible
It’s a scene that plays out in almost every session: the client who describes their experience with the metaphor, “I feel like I’m carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders,” or “My mind feels like a ball of wool.” These metaphors don’t merely describe an emotion or a situation, they transform an abstract feeling into something tangible, something the client can see and engage with. They allow us, as therapists, to gain a clearer understanding of the emotional landscape our clients are navigating. Without these metaphors, we might struggle to access the depth of their experiences, leaving them stuck in their emotional worlds, but with them, we can begin to uncover the layers that may otherwise remain hidden.
The reason metaphors are so effective, is that they allow us to communicate the complex and often confusing inner experiences of our clients in a way that is both understandable and relatable. Research from the University of California, Berkeley, indicates that metaphors can facilitate greater engagement with emotional experiences and stimulate problem-solving, by activating areas of the brain that are involved in both cognitive processing and emotional regulation (Gibbs, 2008). Essentially, metaphors help us make the invisible visible or the unconscious conscious, allowing the client to see their struggles from a fresh perspective and enabling us to dive deeper into their emotional landscape. In the process, the metaphor becomes a mirror, reflecting the client’s internal world in a way that is both accessible and impactful.
What’s truly remarkable about metaphors, is how they provide emotional distance. By framing an emotional experience as something external, be it a weight on the shoulders, a storm, or a cloud hovering overhead, the client can step back and look at their emotions with more objectivity. This distance often allows them to process what they’re feeling without becoming overwhelmed by it. It’s as though the metaphor gives them the space to breathe, to view the experience with less intensity, and to engage with it in a way that makes it easier to navigate. This emotional separation doesn’t diminish the importance or validity of the feeling, it simply allows for a more manageable exploration. As a result, metaphors create an emotional safe space, enabling both the therapist and the client to work through difficult material without getting lost in it.
The Creativity of "It's Like..."
There’s something inherently creative about metaphors. They aren’t confined by logic or linear thinking, instead, they invite both the client and the therapist to think outside the box, to embrace new ways of seeing and understanding the world. When I ask a client to finish the sentence, “My feelings are like...,” I’m often astounded by the variety and richness of responses. One might describe their anxiety as “a storm; it’s unpredictable, powerful and out of control,” while another might say, “My sadness is like an empty desert; there’s no sign of life, no sense of direction.”
These metaphors are powerful not just because they articulate the client’s emotional experience, but because they offer a glimpse into how they perceive their struggles. They provide a window into their inner world, often revealing things that might not have been expressed otherwise. These creative metaphors are a language unto themselves, one that reveals as much about the client’s mindset as it does about their emotional state, and once the metaphor is in place, it becomes a tool for deeper exploration.
The real magic happens when we use the metaphor as a starting point for conversation. We can ask the client questions like, “What might help calm that storm?” or “How could we bring some life to that desert?” These questions don’t simply reflect a desire to understand the client’s experience, they actively invite the client to reflect, explore, and problem-solve. What begins as a poetic description of their feelings, can quickly evolve into a dynamic exploration of potential solutions, coping strategies, and new ways of thinking about their challenges. By encouraging clients to work with their metaphors, we can open up space for creative problem-solving and insight, offering fresh perspectives that might not have emerged through regular conversation.
Metaphors for Change
What’s perhaps most fascinating about metaphors is that they’re not static. As clients evolve, so too does their use of metaphors. At the start of therapy, a client might describe their experience as “a brick wall; solid, impenetrable, and unyielding,” but over time, as they begin to process their emotions and develop new coping mechanisms, that metaphor may shift. The brick wall might become a mountain; still a formidable challenge, but one that can be scaled. Or, perhaps it transforms into a river; something that flows around obstacles rather than smashing into them. These changes in metaphor can be some of the most telling signs of progress in a client’s journey and incredibly useful for you and the client to understand their progress.
Not only do these shifts indicate personal growth, but they also provide a tangible way to measure change. When clients begin to view their challenges differently, when their metaphor evolves, it’s a clear sign that they are shifting their mindset and reframing their experiences. And this shift can be super-empowering. It reinforces the idea that their journey is not a fixed, linear path but one that is dynamic and full of possibility.
Metaphors allow us to frame change in a way that feels less overwhelming. Rather than perceiving their struggles as insurmountable or unchanging, clients can begin to see them as evolving challenges that can be navigated . This shift in perspective creates space for resilience to develop. It reminds them that change, although difficult, is a natural part of life—and it’s something they have the ability to move through, giving them hope for future challenges, understanding that life issues not usually permanent, personal or pervasive.
So, metaphors are far more than just a creative addition to our sessions, they are a powerful tool for making the invisible visible, for unlocking deeper understanding, and for facilitating meaningful change. Through metaphors, clients can express their experiences in ways that words alone cannot capture. We, as therapists, coaches, and counsellors, are then able to engage with those expressions, unlocking new insights and possibilities for growth. So, the next time you sit with a client, encourage them to finish the sentence, “My feelings are like…” You might just be amazed at the treasure trove of insights that comes tumbling out.
References:
Gibbs, R. W. (2008). The Cambridge Handbook of Metaphor and Thought: Ideology, Culture, and Communication. Cambridge University Press.
